Jess Boctor

Category: Adventure On

  • The Art of the Pivot

    Today, the green beans and spinach defeated me.

    After a long day at work and a quick dinner, I decided to tackle making baby food.

    It was my second attempt at something Pinterest assures me is super easy and healthy. Steam, puree, sift. How much trouble can it be?

    Hard enough.

    As I was standing at the food processor, trying to get my spinach to be something other than water, listening to someone else laugh and play with my boy, the disappointment and sadness began to creep in.

    Sad because I wasn’t spending time with my family. Disappointment because I was obviously doing many things wrong — and I don’t like doing things wrong.

    That’s when I decided to pivot.

    A pivot* isn’t giving up. It’s not throwing in the towel. It not being defeated — even if you have vegetable purée smeared all over yourself.

    A pivot is recognizing that the direction you are heading isn’t working as well as you want. A pivot comes out of asking questions like:

    • What is time cost associated with this direction? Is it worth it?
    • Do I have the tools I need for this?
    • Am I getting the results I was hoping for?
    • Is there an alternative direction I can go?

    Even though it requires changing directions, a pivot will keep you walking towards you goal.

    My goal in making food was to try keep Jacob’s diet simple and healthy. However, as I listened to him giggling and laughing with Paul as they got ready for bed, and eventually went to bed, I had to wonder which was the greater cost; using store bought baby food or missing out on time with my son.

    After looking through the ingredients in the store bought food, I decided it was worth it to spend more time with Jacob. I could still keep his diet simple and healthy while using the store bought foods.

    I also decided the way I was trying to make baby food wasn’t working. So I experimented until I found an easier process (but that’s another post).

    Now we have a mix of both. Sometimes I make baby food. When I do, I have the system down to a 20-minute process that I can do while cooking our dinner.

    Sometimes Jacob gets Gerber’s or Beach Nut. I stick to simple foods that contain the desired food and water.

    Sometimes he gets both. Almost all the time, I get to join in on the laughter and getting ready for bed.

    The point of this post isn’t to tell you how to feed your baby. It’s to share that it is okay to change directions when you need to.

    *The concept of the pivot was introduced to me in the book Lean Startup by Eric Ries 

  • Five Minutes Is All I Have

    This little man is five months old today.

    Time is so fickle. It is a horrendous flirt that makes you feel like five months has been so much and also so little. Always thinking you have it and you need it.

    In the midst of the foreplay, it is so simple to miss the little things, the quiet important moments, the good habits, the things that you never regret.

    Time teases and caresses and says, “There is always so much more of me.”

    Until there isn’t.

    I have to admit, the last five years I have been falling for the sandkeepers siren song. Thinking I would always have more time.

    Among many other things, I have been claiming that someday I would have more time to write.

    And somewhere in waiting for more time, I lost my voice to lost time. I blinked and entered a new decade and a new phase of life.

    This last year has taught me a lot about being patient, about treasuring time, and about getting things done today.

    It’s also taught me a lot about taking the small steps. About solving for now. About being content in what I am able to accomplish today rather than procrastinating in hopes of a grand finale.

    So how does one find more time in the throes of a five month old child, a sixteen year marriage, a vibrant community lifestyle, a full time job, and a lifelong journey of faith?

    5 minutes at a time.

    Because that is all I have.

    Adventure on.