Jess Boctor

Category: Uncategorized

  • We wanted a sign; just not that one.

    Life has been…interesting.  

    The husband and I have been at some cross roads lately. Big decisions with big consequences have been before us; all we want is to follow God’s heart. Our prayer is always that Where God leads we would follow. So in this time we have been praying for some confirmations, directions; a sign.

    We got one. 

    Paul was on his way to a job interview yesterday when our truck broke down. Our truck has never broke down like this; it has been really good to us. Since this job is 31 miles away; the truck deciding that it is finally on it’s last leg seems like a good indication that this was not where we are suppose to be heading. Especially when the alternative is close enough to our home that we can walk if necessary. 

    So we got what we asked for.

    Just not in the way we expected.

    Something to keep in mind as we face the other cross roads before us.
    Continuing the adventure,  

    Jess

  • The Old Red Shoes

    I have had these shoes for eight years now. Longer then I have been married, longer then most of my current friendships. These shoes have been through a lot with me. To me these shoes represent a lot of things; they were a present from my Oma, they were bold and out there; I was always complimented when i wore them; and I was always afraid to wear them.

    To illustrate this point, I want to share with you a journal entry from July 2002 when I my Oma first bought them for me.

    The New Red Shoes

    The situation: My Oma bought me a pair of red tennis shoes I absolutely love!

    The dilemma: I hate my feet and do anything to not draw attention them; the bright red draws alot of attention.

    The issue: Do I let my insecurities over the size of my feet stop me from wearing my new red shoes?

    Thoughts and Ideas:

    If I let my insecurities prevail over my feet where will it stop? And do my insecurities over my large feet displease God? In a way I am telling Him, “You made me wrong! My feet are too big!” And in that case I need to remember Isiah 30:16 “Does the jar ever say, ‘The potter is stupid.’” (NLT) I wonder how often I let my insecurities get the better of me and keep me from doing the things I love to do because I am afraid.

    I wish that the next part of this post would be me laughing at how silly was and an assurance that I had past my 17 year old dilemma.

    I wish.

    The truth is, I may have overcome most of my feet issues, but they are quickly replaced with other ones, like say the fact the slowing of my metabolism is starting to show itself in such interesting ways. My fear of wearing things that I love may have been swept away, only to reveal a deeper fear of pursuing what I love. Now I am digging deep to not only tie up a pair of tennis shoes, but to show people who I really am. 

    The journey is long, and unfortunately, these shoes are all but worn out. So as I get ready to say good bye, I try to remember the lessons that they taught me, to hold onto the bold young girl who was brave enough to face her big feet.

    Now can I be bold enough to face my big fears?

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  • Photos

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  • From my journal.

    One Person.pdf

  • 12 Hours of Art

    Yesterday Sandals church had an event to provide its members with opportunities to get plugged in and step up in their faith.

    My role was to be on of the resident artists at the Tom’s Shoes Style Your Soles booth. we sold over 100 pair of shoes. That mean 100 disadvantaged kids get a pair of shoes, and 100 people at Sandals have a pair of one of a kind kicks.

    For others perspective on the day, and more information about the event you can check out these links:

    Dawn Carters Whrrl Slide Show 

    Sandals Church Gateway to Service

    Marchen Studios Blog

    Continuing the adventure,  

    Jessica Boctor

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  • Thoughts about today.

    Today took an interesting turn after 3pm today; here are some of the thoughts that are still lingering in my mind.

    Rejection answers a lot of questions. Having my entrance into the Fulbright program denied pretty much confirms that I am 1. not as good at procrastinating as I thought 2. meant to stay in Riverside (at least for the time being)

    The meeting at work did not go as well as I had hoped. May be an indicator that I went dancing over people’s toes again. Dang.

    MS is officially out of money, means I am going to need to be extra creative and diligent in the coming months (franchise taxes don’t care if you make money or not)

    Non maintenance friends are the best cure for and afternoon like this one.

    Continuing the adventure,  

    Jessica Boctor

    www.phantomblonde.com
    www.thegiftedchronicles.ning.com
    www.marchenstudios.com

  • Happiness is….

    walking home in the evening light with a stack of library books tucked under my arm.

    Today, I had a few moments of extra time between coming home from work and when PB and I need to be at a friends last supper. So, in a giggdy rush I fled to our libray, which lucky for me is only about 2 blocks away.

    I was able to use self control, and I came home with only three books. I think I may try and pull an all nighter on friday night; ooo the possibilities. So here is what I selected:

    The Singing by Alison Croggon, it has three elements that I love; a girl heroine, singing, and tolkein-isq mythology. Yay!

    If This Is Love, I’ll Take Spaghetti (a collection of nine short stories) by Ellen Conford, I have to admit, the title grabbed me and so home it came.

    A Northern Light by Jennifer Donnelly. Again, this has multiple elements of things I love; Girl Heroines, a love of words and a historical setting.

    So, I’m signing off now, how could I stay on with treasures like this lying on the bed next to me?

    Continuing the Adventure,

    Jessica